Today would have been my sister's 49th Birthday. The last time I saw her was a year ago. Our family was in Ohio and we spent the evening with her and her famiy, her bil Bob and his daughter, celebrating her birthday. Her sons, 6'5" and 6'3", both studying opera, with voices that fill the house and your soul, made dinner and served everyone, along with their short and bubbly sister, Miss Laugh Factory, pictured above with her Momma. Sweet fellowship.
I am not feeling the pain of the loss quite so much. It is more a bittersweet hurt than an open wound. But I am surprised at how often when I'm interacting with people I think, "They are going to die." It's such a pragmatic thought, and one that shocks me each time. I think the suddenness and unexpectedness of Sue's death has caused me, once again, to feel the fragility of life. "The grass withers, the flowers fade.." and in many ways humans are as fragile and fleeting as both.
We've been reading The Narnia series out loud in the evenings and last night we read about the victory of High King Peter and King Caspian. At the end of the battle Aslan hosts a feast. It's around a great fire and includes Talking Animals, DLF's, nyads, dryads, and dwarfs as well as humans.
"The best thing of all about this feast was that there was no breaking up or going away, but as the talk grew quieter and slower, one after another would begin to nod and finally drop off to sleep with feet towards the fire and good friends on either side..."
My notsolittles, who had been interrupting the entire story to act out a scene, or to ask a question,or to embellish in some manner, snuggled down and got quiet at this part of the story, small smiles of contentment on their faces. I think that the longing for feasting and fellowship and being surrounded by both the holy, the familiar and the mysterious, as well as fellowship of the soul is knit into all of us.
My faith, and my hope, is that Sue is feasting and fellowshipping with those she loves that have gone before, that thier joy is unspeakable. No more tears, no more sorrow, no more pain. Healing and mystery, the Holy and sweet fellowship. That this birthday for her is another day of joyous celebration with the Eternal.
And some day I'll be there. No more breaking up or going away, but an eternity of feasting with the High King and with good friends. And with Sisters.
Love you, Suz.
I am not feeling the pain of the loss quite so much. It is more a bittersweet hurt than an open wound. But I am surprised at how often when I'm interacting with people I think, "They are going to die." It's such a pragmatic thought, and one that shocks me each time. I think the suddenness and unexpectedness of Sue's death has caused me, once again, to feel the fragility of life. "The grass withers, the flowers fade.." and in many ways humans are as fragile and fleeting as both.
We've been reading The Narnia series out loud in the evenings and last night we read about the victory of High King Peter and King Caspian. At the end of the battle Aslan hosts a feast. It's around a great fire and includes Talking Animals, DLF's, nyads, dryads, and dwarfs as well as humans.
"The best thing of all about this feast was that there was no breaking up or going away, but as the talk grew quieter and slower, one after another would begin to nod and finally drop off to sleep with feet towards the fire and good friends on either side..."
My notsolittles, who had been interrupting the entire story to act out a scene, or to ask a question,or to embellish in some manner, snuggled down and got quiet at this part of the story, small smiles of contentment on their faces. I think that the longing for feasting and fellowship and being surrounded by both the holy, the familiar and the mysterious, as well as fellowship of the soul is knit into all of us.
My faith, and my hope, is that Sue is feasting and fellowshipping with those she loves that have gone before, that thier joy is unspeakable. No more tears, no more sorrow, no more pain. Healing and mystery, the Holy and sweet fellowship. That this birthday for her is another day of joyous celebration with the Eternal.
And some day I'll be there. No more breaking up or going away, but an eternity of feasting with the High King and with good friends. And with Sisters.
Love you, Suz.
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