Sunday, September 14, 2014

Where've Ya Been?

It's been over 2 months since I lasted posted. I vowed when I first started this blog that I would never be caught dead writing a post that began or included the words, "My poor neglected blog..." And so you wont be reading that now. This is the longest blog break I've taken in just over 5 years of blogging. It was intentional, and much needed.

My life has changed significantly in the past couple of years. As of last month, I've been working for over a year after a twenty-year hiatus from a professional job; getting one, given that we live 2 miles from the middle of nowhere and are still committed to homeschooling, was a challenge in its own right.  Last year I tried to keep up with doing reviews, blogging, homeschooling and working, but all of that coupled with some personal heart-ache was too much; too much pressure, too many demands.

This spring I finished up all of the reviews I had committed to; sadly (sniffle) resigned from the amazing TOS Review Crew (whom I love and miss!), quite one part time job, and buckled down for the busy season at aforementioned professional job that I love and have been greatly challenged by.

In addition, we changed co-ops; which was a huge decision and not done lightly. We've been part of a wonderful, Godly,  homeschooling fellowship since the year after our house fire. We have taught and learned together, done parties and sleep-overs and family camp together. But there were some changes made, which, because of our faith affiliation, made it impossible for me to teach for them and difficult for us to get there. Instead we have joined the newly re-formed Classical Conversations Community in our area, where I can Tutor in the mornings and use their wifi in the afternoons while the kids are in Essentials. We also started a weekly co-op in our way out in the country home, with other country mice that  are as eager for classes and fellowship as we are. It's a totally new season. In many ways, it feels very God ordained, which, given the past two years, I am deeply grateful for. It's been a huge adjustment, to be sure, and not a week goes by that my kids don't mention SMF and how much they loved choir and the songs we learned and how they wish they could have Ana or Jannell for art, for just one more year. But they also mention every week how much they love our little co-op in the country, and the people who are coming and what they are learning. Good memories of what has been and good memories being made. Thank-you, Jesus!

I am still working and homeschooling. Working professionally, from home, presents its own set of challenges. Like when to leave work. Like how to sound professional on the phone, when the kids are putting away the dishes. Like how to get it all done. And I've really wondered if continuing this blog is even possible. I'm not a half-in kind of person. I am irritatingly all in, or all out. So, committing to continue this blog has been a huge decision to come to.

My sweet Cub, who is now taller than me and my most faithful blog reader and who probably won't want to be called sweet, especially publically, asks weekly, sometimes daily, when I am going to blog again. And I put him off with equal regularity. But today, randomly, I was asked by two different people, from two different towns if I was still blogging, and they both made comments about how encouraging my writing was. And then, someone whom I just meet asked me a pointed question, paused for a moment at my response and stated, "So, vocationally, you are an educator." Shamzam. Why, yes, yes I am.

Which was the point of this blog to begin with. To offer encouragement, ideas, and thoughts for others who might find themselves off the beaten path, ether educationally, or spiritually, or vocationally, or socially. That's where we live. And oy vey; it's a hard path to walk. So being a Ecclessiastes 4:9 follower, I offer encouragement to others on the narrow way.

I've gotten a bit crippled up the past couple of years on this dangerous journey. The outcomes that I was pretty darn sure of have taken a wrong turn and we have come to relinquish and release people and hopes and the longings of our hearts on way too many levels. My heart has been painfully broken. For awhile I thought it might just stay that way and my belief in prayer, and faith and Christian family,  my hope and joy in the One True Living God waned. But, by the grace of my Heavenly Father, and the ministry of His people, my broken heart has been bound up and begun to heal. Thank-you, Sweet Friends who have prayed, encouraged and believed for me when I could not.

And so, with that, I trust myself to write again; about education, about bringing up children in the fear and admonition of the Lord; about following the Ancient Paths, classical education, friends- the usual stuff I've written about for the past 5 years. But, being older, and hopefully, a bit wiser, I am crystal clear that no matter how faithful we are, the outcomes are up to each individual and to the Lord. In other words, we may be faithful parents, but our children must work out their own salvation with fear and trembling. We may be faithful educators, but our students must still take in and learn what we teach. I am not so sure of some things anymore, and more certain of others than ever before.

We only have 3 kids still at home, two of whom we are homeschooling. Feeche is a full time college student with the dual goal of a debt free degree made possible through a combination of hard work, CLEPs, scholarships and living at home.

Which leaves 2 kids still homeschooling, Cub, in 9th grade and Flower in 6th. Homeschooling this year includes the above mentioned co-op, CC, Science Club with Ms. Margy, Learning Labs with Bridgeway Academy, and a plethora of other resources, like Ballroom Dancing and a fledgling STOA Club that I am tremulously starting with some long-time friends. We make ready use of CC CD's and CC Connected and as many other resources as we can find, as usual.

I'm not sure how often I'll post. I'm not sure how many reviews, or pictures will be included, or how much time I'll really have to do this. But we'll just see how it goes as we go along.

As always, thank-you Dear Reader, for reading Golden Grasses

(I hope you are happy, Dear Cub. I love you forever). 

@Golden Grasses 2008-2013. All photographs, artwork and text are the property of the owner unless otherwise stated. Don't miss a thing! Subscribe to Golden Grasses and get our articles right to your inbox!


Jannell said...

I am not so sure of some things anymore, and more certain of others than ever before.

Favorite quote.

Cub's not the only one happy. Let's hang after science some time soon.

Anonymous said...

There you are! Great to see you back, yet I totally understand why you've been done so long. Thank you for sharing your journey with us. My kids have debated in STOA. Good league. :)

Anonymous said...

Good to hear from you. Twigs from WTM forum.

Amy @ Hope Is the Word said...

I didn't realize you were back, and I'm so glad! I pray that your heart continues to heal. You're encouraging to others not as far down the path as you by being transparent (or as transparent as you can be on a blog!) and still being committed to this alternate path. Thank you!